Adventures of an average VA girl - Day 1
I realize I haven't posted in a while. I suppose you could chalk it up to me being super-boring and having nothing going on in my life. Well, all that changed this weekend. One of my dearest and best friends got married this weekend to another friend in Connecticut. Here's the story of my journey north...
Friday morning dawned clear and bright. I was perfectly on schedule: I left the house at 9am and hoped to be in Connecticut by around 4. I stopped across the street from my house at the ATM for toll money, and then went right next door to the gas station to fill up. I was back in the car putting everything away when someone knocks on my window. After putting a dent in the ceiling of my car from jumping out of my skin, I see a man - perhaps of Indian lineage - short, maybe 40ish, and definitely not grasping the English language with both hands - holding a tiny scrap of paper. Not wanting to be rude (but also not wanting to be stupid) I roll my window down a fraction of an inch and say "Yes?" He pushes the tiny scrap of paper through my window - it reads "I just want to let you know you are beautiful." I glance at it, then as I look at him completely befuddled, he says, "You keep as souvenier."
WHAT THE EFF??? Is this creepy guy at Wal-Mart in disguise??? The one who told my mother whom I was shopping with that I was "very beautiful" and kept appearing in the same aisles we were in as if hoping to seal some sort of marriage contract in exchange for two relatively healthy camels? Was it because I was wearing a new pair of jeans? Was it because I showered that morning? Was I the first and only woman he'd ever seen in his entire life? I guess I'll never know, but I can't help but feel creeped out. A rather odd way to start a road trip...
Well, creepy gas station guy aside, I started heading north up the east coast and by around 1 - 2 I was already halfway up the New Jersey Turnpike. Making good time, my GPS estimated I'd be in Connecticut by 4pm. Awesome! Time to check into the hotel, and then run to Macy's to get the wedding gift I'd procrastinated getting them.
That's when my luck ran out.
My 'trusty' GPS told me to get off the Turnpike at Newark Airport. Now, I distinctly remember Mapquest saying to get off at the George Washington Bridge when I had checked it the night before. But hey - that's what the GPS tells me to do, and as I obviously have zero knowledge of New Jersey geography, I comply. Off at the Newark Airport it is.
I still can't figure if I took a wrong exit off of 78 or if the GPS TOLD me to get off at that weird exit on 78, but within 20 minutes, I found myself smack dab in Jersey City. Wait a second - I'm not supposed to be wandering around a city - I want INTERSTATES, DAMMIT! The feel of the wind in my hair! The freedom to go 75 mph or faster!! The directions to go through the Holland Tunnel!!! Holland Tunnel? Wait a minute - why does that sound familiar and where exactly does it tunnel to??
"Welcome to Manhattan!"
"HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I have never seen three scarier words in the English language. Okay, backing up a bit, let me reiterate that I am a Northern Virginia girl, who doesn't even like to drive in DC for cripes sake, and even refused to look for a job there because of it! Now, I'm in Manhattan? Alone? In an SUV?!? I completely freak out and call my mom (Yes I'm a wuss - we all know this - let's move on). She calms me down and I decide I'm not having any of this Manhattan crap and go back through the Holland tunnel. Now I'm in Jersey City again. My GPS keeps yelling at me to go back to Manhattan - "Recalculating...at nearest intersection, make a U-turn. Then go .6 miles to Holland Tunnel." AAAAAAARGH!!! I'll save the minutia, but suffice it to say that in my panic I wandered around pointlessly for quite some time (still on the phone with my mom - I don't think she got much work done on Friday) trying to find a different way up north that did not include Manhattan, all while my GPS continually reiterated its desire for me to GO TO MANHATTAN.
I remember saying the phrase "That's it I'm going home" several times. I was seriously ready to call it quits and ask Matt & Michelle for pictures later. But then I realized - I'm in New York. I'm 4/5 there already. Grow a friggin' backbone and GROW UP. It's just New York City. How bad can it be?
I'm lost in one of the biggest cities in America. The GPS is the only one who knows where to go, but I don't trust it anymore. And by the time I came out of the Holland Tunnel again, my cell phone died. Now I'm completely alone.
On my first trip through the tunnel, it tried to get me to turn left on Canal St. and get on 9A which supposedly takes you around the perimeter of the island. I missed Canal St. because no one would let me over. The second time through the tunnel, I was prepared to get over to the left early - until the GPS said "Severe traffic ahead - recalculating." Oh goody! Maybe it will take me off the island and back to solid interstate land!
WRONG. What does the 'trusty' GPS tell me to do? Get on 1st avenue and start heading north. Yes - 1st Ave. 6 miles. With about 90 gazillion cabs. And this is what I learned: apparently, all New Yorkers make lanes where there are no lanes, get within 1 inch of your car and honk if you hang back as to not 'block the box' when the light turns red. Then when they see I'm not going to move forward and block the box, they go around me and block the box themselves, thus forcing me to sit through the same goddamn light 8 times. They also honk at you to move BEFORE the light even turns green! A pre-emptive honk if you will. I honestly don't know how I did it, but I somehow managed to get all the way down 1st Ave. with no damage to my car, no damage to any other cars, and no flat tires from the 100 gazillion potholes I went through. And I even managed to smile twice: once when I noticed the signs posted on the street that say "Don't Honk" (do they actually think this works?) and once when stuck at a red light watching two guys standing in the middle of the street - one selling water bottles (I'm assuming for about $10 each) and the other one was selling - socks. Yes socks. In the middle of the Bronx in the middle of the street. Socks.
I ended up getting on Bruckner Blvd, which led to Bruckner Expressway which led to the Bronx Expressway. Expressway? That usually means something that will in turn lead you to an interstate of some sort! Woohoo! I come up the cloverleaf to get on the Bronx Expressway thinking I'm home free - until on the horizon, I see the blackest, darkest, most ominous looking rain cloud I've ever seen. Holy crap please let me get out of New York City before it starts raining.
Well I almost made it. About 5 minutes onto the Bronx Expressway, I apparently ran into a hurricane. Yes, HURRICANE. This was not some 'normal' Washington DC area thunderstorm where we get excited if we get a handful of BB sized hail pellets, this was literally a hurricane. I actually saw tree limbs break off and fly 20 feet before landing in the middle of the road. The windshield wipers on ultra-high couldn't clear enough rain to allow me to see any more than two extremely blurry red blobs I had to assume were the brake lights of the car in front of me. We were crawling along the Bronx Expressway at about 3 mph. At certain points, we had to come to a dead stop.
That's when it started hailing.
And as I mentioned before, this was not cutesy DC hail. This was dime sized hail falling in BUCKETS. I swear I thought my windshield was going to crack. It sounded like people were throwing rocks at every inch of my car. At this point, the rain, hail, tree limbs snapping everywhere, and the fact that the Bronx Expressway has jersey barriers on both sides in several spots refusing to let the rain drain anywhere all added up to the fact that we were now traveling through rivers anywhere from 3 - 12 inches deep. Well if I was cursing the fact I was driving an SUV down 1st Ave. before, now I was thanking God that I was driving an SUV through these new-made lakes. Even so, my brakes were mushy by the time the rain ended about 20 minutes later. But I was able to keep moving, and finally ended up on some route or other that I could only hope would lead me away from New York City.
The last uneventful hour led me through New York state to Connecticut in a cold, soaked landscape that nevertheless I have to admit was beautiful. But I also don't think I've ever been so happy to see a Courtyard by Marriott in my life.
At this point it's after 8pm. It's taken me 11 hours to make a 7 hour trip. Sorry Matt and Michelle, you'll get your wedding present - after I get back to Virginia.
Right now, I'm going to bed.
Stay tuned for Part 2 - PARTY!!!
Friday morning dawned clear and bright. I was perfectly on schedule: I left the house at 9am and hoped to be in Connecticut by around 4. I stopped across the street from my house at the ATM for toll money, and then went right next door to the gas station to fill up. I was back in the car putting everything away when someone knocks on my window. After putting a dent in the ceiling of my car from jumping out of my skin, I see a man - perhaps of Indian lineage - short, maybe 40ish, and definitely not grasping the English language with both hands - holding a tiny scrap of paper. Not wanting to be rude (but also not wanting to be stupid) I roll my window down a fraction of an inch and say "Yes?" He pushes the tiny scrap of paper through my window - it reads "I just want to let you know you are beautiful." I glance at it, then as I look at him completely befuddled, he says, "You keep as souvenier."
WHAT THE EFF??? Is this creepy guy at Wal-Mart in disguise??? The one who told my mother whom I was shopping with that I was "very beautiful" and kept appearing in the same aisles we were in as if hoping to seal some sort of marriage contract in exchange for two relatively healthy camels? Was it because I was wearing a new pair of jeans? Was it because I showered that morning? Was I the first and only woman he'd ever seen in his entire life? I guess I'll never know, but I can't help but feel creeped out. A rather odd way to start a road trip...
Well, creepy gas station guy aside, I started heading north up the east coast and by around 1 - 2 I was already halfway up the New Jersey Turnpike. Making good time, my GPS estimated I'd be in Connecticut by 4pm. Awesome! Time to check into the hotel, and then run to Macy's to get the wedding gift I'd procrastinated getting them.
That's when my luck ran out.
My 'trusty' GPS told me to get off the Turnpike at Newark Airport. Now, I distinctly remember Mapquest saying to get off at the George Washington Bridge when I had checked it the night before. But hey - that's what the GPS tells me to do, and as I obviously have zero knowledge of New Jersey geography, I comply. Off at the Newark Airport it is.
I still can't figure if I took a wrong exit off of 78 or if the GPS TOLD me to get off at that weird exit on 78, but within 20 minutes, I found myself smack dab in Jersey City. Wait a second - I'm not supposed to be wandering around a city - I want INTERSTATES, DAMMIT! The feel of the wind in my hair! The freedom to go 75 mph or faster!! The directions to go through the Holland Tunnel!!! Holland Tunnel? Wait a minute - why does that sound familiar and where exactly does it tunnel to??
"Welcome to Manhattan!"
"HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I have never seen three scarier words in the English language. Okay, backing up a bit, let me reiterate that I am a Northern Virginia girl, who doesn't even like to drive in DC for cripes sake, and even refused to look for a job there because of it! Now, I'm in Manhattan? Alone? In an SUV?!? I completely freak out and call my mom (Yes I'm a wuss - we all know this - let's move on). She calms me down and I decide I'm not having any of this Manhattan crap and go back through the Holland tunnel. Now I'm in Jersey City again. My GPS keeps yelling at me to go back to Manhattan - "Recalculating...at nearest intersection, make a U-turn. Then go .6 miles to Holland Tunnel." AAAAAAARGH!!! I'll save the minutia, but suffice it to say that in my panic I wandered around pointlessly for quite some time (still on the phone with my mom - I don't think she got much work done on Friday) trying to find a different way up north that did not include Manhattan, all while my GPS continually reiterated its desire for me to GO TO MANHATTAN.
I remember saying the phrase "That's it I'm going home" several times. I was seriously ready to call it quits and ask Matt & Michelle for pictures later. But then I realized - I'm in New York. I'm 4/5 there already. Grow a friggin' backbone and GROW UP. It's just New York City. How bad can it be?
I'm lost in one of the biggest cities in America. The GPS is the only one who knows where to go, but I don't trust it anymore. And by the time I came out of the Holland Tunnel again, my cell phone died. Now I'm completely alone.
On my first trip through the tunnel, it tried to get me to turn left on Canal St. and get on 9A which supposedly takes you around the perimeter of the island. I missed Canal St. because no one would let me over. The second time through the tunnel, I was prepared to get over to the left early - until the GPS said "Severe traffic ahead - recalculating." Oh goody! Maybe it will take me off the island and back to solid interstate land!
WRONG. What does the 'trusty' GPS tell me to do? Get on 1st avenue and start heading north. Yes - 1st Ave. 6 miles. With about 90 gazillion cabs. And this is what I learned: apparently, all New Yorkers make lanes where there are no lanes, get within 1 inch of your car and honk if you hang back as to not 'block the box' when the light turns red. Then when they see I'm not going to move forward and block the box, they go around me and block the box themselves, thus forcing me to sit through the same goddamn light 8 times. They also honk at you to move BEFORE the light even turns green! A pre-emptive honk if you will. I honestly don't know how I did it, but I somehow managed to get all the way down 1st Ave. with no damage to my car, no damage to any other cars, and no flat tires from the 100 gazillion potholes I went through. And I even managed to smile twice: once when I noticed the signs posted on the street that say "Don't Honk" (do they actually think this works?) and once when stuck at a red light watching two guys standing in the middle of the street - one selling water bottles (I'm assuming for about $10 each) and the other one was selling - socks. Yes socks. In the middle of the Bronx in the middle of the street. Socks.
I ended up getting on Bruckner Blvd, which led to Bruckner Expressway which led to the Bronx Expressway. Expressway? That usually means something that will in turn lead you to an interstate of some sort! Woohoo! I come up the cloverleaf to get on the Bronx Expressway thinking I'm home free - until on the horizon, I see the blackest, darkest, most ominous looking rain cloud I've ever seen. Holy crap please let me get out of New York City before it starts raining.
Well I almost made it. About 5 minutes onto the Bronx Expressway, I apparently ran into a hurricane. Yes, HURRICANE. This was not some 'normal' Washington DC area thunderstorm where we get excited if we get a handful of BB sized hail pellets, this was literally a hurricane. I actually saw tree limbs break off and fly 20 feet before landing in the middle of the road. The windshield wipers on ultra-high couldn't clear enough rain to allow me to see any more than two extremely blurry red blobs I had to assume were the brake lights of the car in front of me. We were crawling along the Bronx Expressway at about 3 mph. At certain points, we had to come to a dead stop.
That's when it started hailing.
And as I mentioned before, this was not cutesy DC hail. This was dime sized hail falling in BUCKETS. I swear I thought my windshield was going to crack. It sounded like people were throwing rocks at every inch of my car. At this point, the rain, hail, tree limbs snapping everywhere, and the fact that the Bronx Expressway has jersey barriers on both sides in several spots refusing to let the rain drain anywhere all added up to the fact that we were now traveling through rivers anywhere from 3 - 12 inches deep. Well if I was cursing the fact I was driving an SUV down 1st Ave. before, now I was thanking God that I was driving an SUV through these new-made lakes. Even so, my brakes were mushy by the time the rain ended about 20 minutes later. But I was able to keep moving, and finally ended up on some route or other that I could only hope would lead me away from New York City.
The last uneventful hour led me through New York state to Connecticut in a cold, soaked landscape that nevertheless I have to admit was beautiful. But I also don't think I've ever been so happy to see a Courtyard by Marriott in my life.
At this point it's after 8pm. It's taken me 11 hours to make a 7 hour trip. Sorry Matt and Michelle, you'll get your wedding present - after I get back to Virginia.
Right now, I'm going to bed.
Stay tuned for Part 2 - PARTY!!!
posted by Danni at
8:23 PM
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